How to cheat on exams
Updated: Jun 15, 2021
(A professional guide based on personal fifteen years of experience)
Being a student is stressful. From elementary, you are taught to behave, do what you’re told from your teachers, and to never cheat on exams. However, the pressure of getting good grades in high school to get into a good college, and later getting good grades in college to get into a good masters or simply to find a good job, can get to the best of us. Don’t get me wrong, we all need the knowledge in order to be able to put it into practice someday. Yet, there are times when the brain freezes during exams and you can’t seem to remember anything. Or, you are taking this goddamn hard course that has nothing to do with what you are going to need later in life even though it’s part of the curriculum. In other cases, you might just feel lazy to the point where studying feels like the most horrible activity you could be doing in your life. Maybe you are a teenager exploring life and yourself for the first time, or you are a hustler and have other priorities. Nevertheless, you need good grades in this competitive environment of today’s society. There is a very easy solution to that – cheating!
1. Confidence is the foundation of it all!
Starting from the moment you set foot in the classroom where you will be taking the exam until you leave, you need to seem as confident as possible. Maybe you will need some acting classes for this one, but it is indeed a crucial component. Act like you have studied weeks in advance and remain calm. Professors or supervisors will start getting suspicious if they notice you being anxious and scared. Most of the time, they catch you cheating because they see you acting fidgety, or looking around. That’s why you have to seem like you’re focused on the paper in front of you at all times. And, when you conduct the crime, you should do it so smoothly as if you really believe you’re doing nothing wrong. Whatever strategy you choose, should be followed by absolute confidence in the fact that you are acting completely normal. The supervisors will assume you are actually not doing anything suspicious. It is all about the façade sometimes!
2. Do not take it too far and be cautious! Cheat on exams irregularly!
Being confident and finding ways to cheat is one thing, but taking it too far will not get you anywhere besides the principal’s office. For example, if you are particularly bad in a subject, don’t cheat your way into an A. It will simply raise suspicions, and even if they don’t catch you the first time, they definitely will the second time, since they will pay very close attention to you. Also, don’t overestimate your abilities. Confidence is one thing and overconfidence another.
3. Wrap it all up in the classic cheat sheet.
The cheat sheet works particularly well for math exams or any subject in which you have to remember some key formulas. The best part about cheat sheets is that they can be hidden in many creative and smart ways, thus reducing your chances of getting caught. Let’s take a look at the process of maximizing your cheat-sheet outcome:
First, you need to identify the most crucial information that you will put in a piece of paper. The more condensed and the smaller it is – will be easier to cheat on exams and not get caught. So, gather all the formulas, keywords, dates, or whatever it is you need for the exam and write it in the tiniest handwriting possible. Make sure it is just big enough for you to be able to read it though… (Secret tip: make it a printed cheat sheet to reduce the chances of it being traced back to you).
Now, you have to choose a method of hiding it.
The water bottle method: this requires some careful preparations, but I believe it is totally worth the effort. You have to print out a water label, and write your cheat sheet in it with an identical font as that of the water brand. To save you some time, you can simply use online templates, fill them in, and print them. Then, replace the actual bottle label with the fake one. For more detailed instructions, check out this video: https://www.instructables.com/Cheat-on-Exams-Using-Water-Bottles/.
The body parts method: This is the easiest and maybe oldest trick in the book. If you are a male, glue your cheat sheet with tape on your forearm, and make sure to wear long sleeves. If you are a female, do the same in your upper thigh, and wear a dress or a skirt. To be fair, females are a bit advantaged in this one, since it would be inappropriate for a teacher to ask a girl to lift her skirt up.
The safe location method: If you are just beginning to cheat on exams and really want to avoid any danger of getting caught, there is one thing you can do. Hide your cheat sheet somewhere that it cannot be connected to you in any way. It can be a chair nearby, a bulletin board in the classroom, or even better, the bathroom.
4. Partners in crime save the time – find the Fred to your George Wesley.
I will not get into the details of ethical behavior here since I left ethics behind since I started this article. So, for this next cheating method, you will need another person taking the test at the same time as you.
Preferably, it is someone you know and whose consent you gained. Meet with them a day before the exam and create a system that you can use to signal each other the correct answers. First, agree on a signal that will grab the attention of the other, but find one that is as subtle as possible. Then, decide on signals for the right alternative, and for the question number. (Secret tip: establish a sign for the “wrong answer”. It will really come in handy if one of you is sure that the other has the wrong answer).
But, if you don’t have anyone that can willingly be your partner in crime, there is another way. Identify someone who is highly likely to do well in the exam, and sit behind them. Adjust your chair on the far left or right of the table (without seeming suspicious), in order to have a diagonal field of vision of the paper of the person in front of you.
Disclaimer: The above tips work for old on-ground education. Lately, due to COVID-19, that seems like a far-fetched dream, so I will also give you some tips on cheating while having an online exam.
5. The (invisible) elephant in the room.
One of the most obvious but also easiest ways to cheat on exams during an online session is to have someone else in the room, who is an expert on the subject. For this tip, I will heavily rely on a personal experience. I am currently a political science student, and as you can probably guess, I hate math and exact sciences. Yet, sadly, I have to take a couple of math classes for my general education. So, to not destroy my CGPA, I had to come up with a way to cheat. I found someone who is great at math (not very hard to do if you study in a university that offers different fields of studying), and I asked them to meet me at the time I had to take the exam. He sat right in front of me, so the camera didn’t capture him. I was required to screen share, so I used my phone to take a picture of the questions, but from an angle that it wouldn’t be visible on camera. I then gave the phone to my friend, who solved the problems on a piece of paper. Lastly, I copied the problem with my own handwriting and submitted them successfully (without getting caught). The person doesn’t really have to be in the same room with you, as you can send them the pictures electronically, but it just makes it easier and faster to have them physically there.
6. Screen mirroring/sharing.
This cheating method can be used with more than one monitor in the location where you are taking the exam. You use one of the monitors to access the exam questions, while the other monitor mirrors the contents of the main monitor. This allows a friend of yours who is knowledgeable in the subject to access the test questions simultaneously and come up with answers. It is easy and effective because it all happens at the same time. You are perceived to be online at your workstation.
Yet, I should tell you: this is a risky endeavor and getting caught is not impossible. It can happen to the most experienced of us. That’s why I will also prepare you for what to do in the worst-case scenario when cheating goes wrong.
1. Innocent until proven guilty!
So, here’s what you need to do first: evaluate the evidence they have against you. If they didn’t catch you hands-on with a cheat sheet, or something else that speaks loudly against you, then you still have a chance. Deny, deny, deny! Do it very calmly and surprised that they are even accusing you. Keep your side of the story simple and do not change the narrative. Repeat that you feel bad about being blamed for cheating after having studied so hard. Also, don’t confess to anyone – no matter how close friends you think you are with someone, they could always betray you.
2. Bless me, Father, for I have sinned…
Well, there comes a point sometimes when all you can do is confess. Especially, if they catch you red-handed and they have strong evidence. Who knows, you might have better chances of being reconciled with the teacher and the school. So, gather your courage and be honest. Admit to cheating, but don’t forget to show remorse – even if you have to fake it. You should repeat constantly how sorry you feel and how you wish you could take it back. Also, it would be worth mentioning that you learned a great and valuable lesson of how you should never cheat on exams ever again. Don’t hesitate to let some tears out as well (told you an acting class would be beneficial). If you do the opposite and act like you don’t care, the teachers are more likely to decide on teaching you a lesson by punishing you. Moreover, try to give some valid reasons and explanations as to why you decided to cheat. Here you have some that could work:
“I was overwhelmed by all the materials we covered, and even though I tried really hard to study, I was scared I wouldn’t be able to do it on my own.”
“My parents are putting a lot of pressure on me to do great in school, and I know I couldn’t get an excellent grade even if I tried because I am not good in this subject, so I decided to cheat.”
“I was distracted by some personal problems I had and forgot about the test until the night before, so I didn’t have enough time to study on my own.”
Even though you are excusing yourself, make it clear to the teacher that you are not trying to excuse yourself. Admit that cheating is wrong and there can never be a good enough reason to cheat on exams, (and, yes, I see the irony here).
Nevertheless, don’t forget that cheating can work more easily with homework. I think it would be wise to spend the time you would usually spend with homework by instead studying enough so you won’t have to cheat on exams. As for homework, assignments, or projects, hire someone to do it for you. I have just the right “someone” in mind: KATREXA. Trust me, academic success has never been easier. Click on the link below, and your assignment is going to be ready for you!
P.S. Using writing services is not cheating. They are merely a tool – you decide how to use them…